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Ep. 1: LGB Tease

The L Word Episode "LGB Tease"

<< The L Word Season 5 | The L Word Episode Guide

Original Air Date: January 6, 2008

Writer: Ilene Chaiken

Director: Angela Robinson

Special Guests: Kristanna Loken (Paige Sobel), Jane Lynch (Joyce Wischnia), and Cybill Shepherd (Phyllis Kroll)

Synopsis: As the fifth season of The L Word opens, Helena's adjustment to prison life is not exactly a smooth one. Bette and Tina sweat their way through the rigorous preschool admissions process for Angelica and a lonely Tina ponders the rigors of seeking a new relationship. Not long after extolling the virtues of Joyce during Alice's podcast, Phyllis begins to have doubts about their relationship and wonders if she should explore other sexual and romantic options while Joyce plans a festive "coming out" party for her at The Planet. Classically unable to avoid temptation, Shane hooks up with a sexy real estate agent, but is discovered in the act by Paige, who furiously puts an end to their relationship. But Shane hasn't heard the last of the scorned and humiliated single mom. Jenny returns from Mexico with a much-abused assistant in tow and a creative bombshell: she is involved with the Greek hedge fund billionaire who is financing Tina's movie company, a development that puts Jenny's script "Lez Girls" back on the fast-track for production – with Jenny attached to direct. The only person happy to see Jenny back home, in the meantime, is Shane. Her friends try to find a new lover for Tina, but her heart's just not in the dating game. Shane's attempt to fly "wingman" for Tina at Phyllis's coming-out party works out as badly as anyone would have predicted. A spark between Tina and Bette blows out when Jodi returns home and resumes trying to break Bette of her type-A tendencies. Two new entrepreneurs from Miami open "Shebar," a rival lesbian night club near The Planet, causing Kit to be concerned about the future of her business – a worry that Shane no longer has when WAX goes up in flames due to an act of arson. Instead of being deployed to Iraq as expected, Tasha shows up at Alice's apartment for a charged reunion – but what is she doing home when her unit is on its way to the Middle East?

HOOKUPS, BREAKUPS, MAKEUPS	NEW ADDITIONS TO 'THE CHART'
Shane and Lexi (estate agent) having sex on the bedroom floor of the apartment she was going to lease with Paige. Bette and Jodi in Jodi's apartment after the whole "table cloth" incident. Alice and Tasha in the hallway of Alice's apartment.

FAN PERSPECTIVES

LOVED IT

NOT SO MUCH

This episode was full of wit and funny lesbian dialogue. Shane feeling threatened by the act of commitment reverted back to her old tactics of messing around. Jenny is in her usual wierd humor by being the bitch that everybody loves to hate because of her adaptation of Lez Girls. Some of the characters magically disappeared as they sometimes do in a tv series, such as Papi, she will be missed. Bette and Jodi continue to try to iron out the wrinkles in their relationship. Since they are both head strong and powerful women, they continue to push each other's buttons, but not taking away from the love and commitment they feel for each other. The other characters of the show are also developing and learning and loving the Lword way. The first episode was all that and more. Thanks Ilene and the rest of the crew for bringing the sexy back to Lesbianism and for keeping us more than entertained while addressing the much overlooked issues of the real world lesbian community. You guys are great, keep up the good work.....please!!!
I think I prefer it to episode 2, basically due to the overt tibette theme, the crazy Jenny distortion of Bette and Tina's party, the manifestation of how wrong Jodi and Bette are for each other in the tablecloth fit, the preschool scene, Helena's expressions in the prison photo shots, the pool scene!!!!!!!, Bette - Jennifer in "so, what are you doing for sex? - ouch", Tina - Laurel in "what? - you wanna know if I'm getting laid",
Tasha and Alice making out in the hallway.

This episode is full of disappointments. First of all, you have Shane looking at homes with Paige and her son, then Shane decides to have sex in an apartment that they were considering with the real estate agent, who behaved so unprofessionally she would've gotten bitch-slapped in the real world. Anyway, Shane gets busted by Paige (and was almost caught by Paige's son). Does anybody out there see how out of character this would be for Shane. She loves kids and would not have taken the chance of getting caught by that kid...no matter who wanted to get "served". One minute she has a conscience, is a real human being, and the next minute she's no better than a dildo that you turn on. And Jenny...my God what have they done to that girl. I'll tell you what! They gave her a lobotomy and switched her brain with the evil Tina from her straight days. I'm sorry, I can't believe that Jenny came back as such a bitch with everyone and is on this prima dona kick. She was always a bit odd, but this turn is absolutely ridiculous and as a story line, so hard to believe. I am getting very disappointed with the story lines and random changes of characters in the L-Word. Whatever happened to Papi? Not that I liked her character any...sorry but she was no Carmen. She just disappeared and is now gone with no explanation (shades of All My Children). And what's all the commotion about a table cloth with Bette and Jodi? A tablecloth?!!! OMG! I feel like if I'm watching the Bizarro version of the L-Word. I'm a NY'er (lesbian) stuck in San Jose, CA, and all the fellow lesbians here feel the same. And yet, just like watching a train wreck about to happen, I can't stop watching. I'm addicted...but like any addict, I wish I could stop now. Bring back the good writing and story lines...please!!!!

WHERE DID THEY GO??

Character Name:

Eva Torres "Papi"Who she is:
Shane's "competition" (but not really)
Played by:
Janina Gavankar
Highlights and Hookups:
Hook-ups with Alice and the next with Helena.
Has been around the block even more than shane.
Was responsible for the "crash" of ourchart.com to many connections.

Papi will not be included in the cast during season five, no information regarding why she has been released.

BEST SCENES & MOMENTS

The scene where Alice, Tina and Shane visit Helena in prison.
Alice and Tasha on the phone
Alice and Tasha hot sex scene
Tina & Bette at Bette's pool.
Bette & Tina at Young Paths Preschool.
Bette & Tina at the Planet.
Jodi and Bette's blindfold scene
Jodi and Bette reuniting at the Planet
Bette ogling Tina while making out with Jodi.
Shane cruising by Jenny and saying 'hey, sugar!", which leads to Jenny grabbing Shane and pulling her back over to give her a kiss.

BEST QUOTES

Alice: I know Mrs. Peabody is a broad and not a very classy one.

Shane: You shouldn't have to live with it.
Paige: It's just sex.
Shane: Paige, it's ... I know it's sex, but ... you deserve someone who wants to be with you and who only loves you and you alone.
Paige: And you don't love me?
Shane: No, I do love you!
Paige: But you're not in love with me.

Bette: Well, I mean, if the thing with Kate didn't work out, I know it's been a long time ... so are you seeing anyone?
Tina: You want to know if I'm getting laid.

Bette: [shrugging] Is that off-limits, too?
Tina: [uncomfortable, getting out of the pool] Yeah, it is. [stopping, wrapping a towel around herself] You know, it's not like I didn't go for months at a time without having sex when we were together.

After Tina leaves, Bette can only say, "Ouch."

Jodi: It's very sweet of you. Thank you. But, um ... it's my space.

Alice: "Oh, my soldier's home!"

Phyllis: The sex ... is the best ever.
Alice: [slightly hurt] Well, ever ... I mean, they say your coming-out affair is usually the most unforgettable.
Phyllis: Oh, that was kindergarten. Preschool! Compared to what Joyce and I are doing?

Shane: Oh, come on, you f---ers, be friends, please. We're neighbors; we've known each other for a while.
Jenny: I never said that Bette and I weren't friends!
Bette: [after a pause; to Shane] We'll see.

Alice: Just don't drop the soap. You know what I'm saying?
Helena: [shakes her head]
Alice and Tina: Don't drop the soap!
Shane: I wouldn't, no.

EPISODE SOUNDTRACK

Artist	Song	What's Happening?
1. The Gossp	Listen Up! (A Touch Of Class Mix)
2. Mae Young	Let's Give Our Love A Try
3. Margie Joseph	Temptations
4. Helen Smith	Thrills And Chills
5. Betty Everett	I'm Afraid Of Losing You
6. Ada Moore	The Devil Is A Woman
7. CC Martini	Candy	Phyllis' coming-out party; Shane and Jenny flirt with each other.
8. Jessy Moss	Sugar
9. Miles Davis	Dr. Jackle
10. Bomber	Going Down

11. The Heart Throbs

Kiss Me While I'm Starving

Tasha comes home and she has hot sex with Alice in the hallway

EPISODE PICTURES & VIDEOS

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jainieg	Latest page update: made by jainieg , Aug 8 2008, 5:18 AM EDT (about this update About This Update Edited by jainieg 37 words added 64 words deleted 1 image added 5 images deleted view changes - complete history)
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mistylucky1

Song when Shane's salon is burning down

Jan 15 2009, 11:43 AM EST by Nat2008

Thread started: Jan 15 2009, 11:42 AM EST Watch

Does anyone know the artist and name of the song when "Wax," Shane's salon, is burning down? I can't find it anywhere.

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angelinaluvzu04

where did she go?

Jul 14 2008, 12:55 AM EDT by katie295

Thread started: Jul 12 2008, 1:54 PM EDT Watch

Where did carmen go?!

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